#but when i'm alone with my thoughts
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#the most fucked up thing about my car accident#is that now i'm not even excited to see my mom again on saturday#i drove to work today and it wasn't bad#but when i'm alone with my thoughts#all i can think about is how much of a failure of a human being i feel like#even though there was no damage#i think just the fact that i'm american#and the kind of job i do#made this into a bigger situation than it could've been#like truthfully i am glad no one was hurt#but i feel so upset angry mad frustrated pissed off at myself#i feel like all the good i've done#all the ways i've improved myself while living here#they went out the window#and the people who hear about this#all they'll see me as#is the american girl who doesn't know how to drive#idk i just want to be excited again#but all i feel is a sense of dread#i fucked everything up for myself
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Common denominator
#hellsing#seras victoria#laura chastel#my art#my oc#hellsing oc#my comic#im. SO proud of this#i thought of this in the shower#and spent a week drawing it.#alucard: leave me alone 🙁#cw nonsexual nudity#Laura doesn't care about being nakey#hc that seras has a bad habit of probing into ppl's business and/or overstepping boundaries from time to time#(unlike Alucard who sees boundaries and intentionally breaches them)#im very happy that I got better at drawing fabric folds#loose clothes my beloved#also the first Alucard is beautiful and I'm proud of it. I always make him so pretty when I draw the stupidest shit#sorry about the panty shot#i hope i got better at drawing comics.
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trying to collect my thoughts about The Bad Boys (that is, jimmy grian and joel)
like. joel and grian are by far the most bloodthirsty people on the server ("aw i'm not the boogey :(" and grian's 3L murder spree while green). meanwhile jimmy is constantly referenced as the most likely to die. they're all horrible chaotic influences on each other, they're egging one another on -- but then they hasten to warn each other about leaf waterlogging on bucket jumps. they spend their afternoons quietly fishing in their little wooden clubhouse... then go back to doing property damage and stealing things and setting fires
it's two short + one tall, but the one tall is all ineffectual bravado and the two short are these totally unhinged berserkers
"we're the only ones allowed to bully jimmy" + "i love my terrifying murderous besties" energy, is this making sense??? they're driving me mad
#fellas please help me rotate them#solidaritygaming#limited life#limited life smp#joel smallishbeans#grian#trafficblr#the bad boys#of the life series lol#shreep#he asked for no pickles DO YOU GET ME#this is what happens when my partner takes a nap and i'm alone with my thoughts pff
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Having bpd to me is like I'm the loneliest person on the planet, no matter how many people I talk to, no matter how many connections I make or have, I'm a lonely void who will die alone. I have to be talking to someone or with someone every second of every minute of every day. I love people so much, I need people. There's so many people out there with different things to teach you. And then, if I have to talk to one person for more than 6 seconds today, I'll kill them. I'll kill myself. I need to be left alone for the rest of the day, I need no one but myself to be happy. I don't want to partake in anything with anyone because it's all draining and taking out of my alone time. Everyone is the same, they're all boring and self-absorbed. Every conversation feels like I'm forcing myself to be actively present. I just want to be alone in my room with nothing or no one. I don't see a future where I'm happy with anyone other than being by myself.
#bpd#bpd vent#actually bpd#bpd thoughts#actually borderline#bpd splitting#lately I've just been slowly moving away from all my friends too#haven't spoken to anyone on insta for days despite usually talking to at least 2-3 friends every few days#irl sent me a video a week ago...never responded. I haven't even been feeling lonely really#I just KNOW when my period creeps up on me I'll be a whining sad piss baby who's openly pathetic about needing human connection#like I wish I just felt no need for it ever. it feels SO good to be alone and not have any obligations as a person#then the crippling loneliness of forever being alone seeps in when tbh I'm fine with it currently actually
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zero's pressure
#running out of gas. running out of money. out of time. out of energy. i'm running out of everything#and ofc my solution is to. avoid it. ignore it. do nothing productive.#zero's pressure turns into zero pressure#i'm trying to be kind to myself. i really have been trying. but it's hard when youre still headed to 0 on everything with no solution#because of yourself#i cant get a job. my art doesnt bring enough. i cant keep producing new products on the regular. i cant finish major comms on time#what CAN i do?#vent#just some adhd things#and maybe anxiety. and bad stress management#sorry for being so raw on main. its therapeutic even if it doesnt really lead to anything. it does force me to confront my feelings ig#i tend to get a burst of motivation after hitting a low like this but its a constant cycle that in the longterm really doesnt improve.#ill probably get some products done and do some quick comms. just one of those alone can cover gas for me#anyway some positivity to toot my own horn: i love the palette of this piece. went harder than i thought
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chapter 90 vash
#vash the stampede#trigun#trigun maximum#trimax spoilers#trigun spoilers#i forget how the blacklist stuff works on tumblr again... uncertain whether it matters or not for it to be in the caption itself#anyway my mind was reflecting again on the later chapters of trigun :lying down: i'm not sure how to collect my thoughts#but i think all the time about vash's “if i shoot him now she'll die” line in ch 15#and considering vash haven't had long at all to grieve after ch 64... aughh... augh.... mourning both of them in ch 91#vash's emotional state after 64 is really so. It's devastating watching him bc he's still being all smiley around his friends and allies#but when he's alone - charging the bullets and during those first two battles - he's just so quiet#and all of that kept emotion just breaks like a dam in 90... all of that to say.. legato is really incredible dgmks#ruporas art
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"Yeah, but we talked about it and I didn’t want it." "Why not?" "Because it scared me."
#critical role#ygifs#cr3#fearne#she got me fucked up#her leaving her treasured cherished postcards at the altar of the raven queen where so many memories are left#leaving the one thing that had been her lifeline and her hope. the most important thing to her and she leaves them behind#because they weren't what she thought they were.#her innocence growing into sadness and that's the reason why she feared the dark versions of herself#because she was sad and angry and alone#this faun wearing her heart on her sleeve and running from what hurts her and it's just. ms johnson i'm#''do you think it’s the world changing you or do you think it’s you changing in the world?'' ''yes.'' girl i'm on my knees#I couldn't be more grateful fearne continued from exu this growth hurts so so so good I'd die for her#fearne angry? delicious. fearne sad? delicious. fearne tits? del-#fearne this episode you can really taste the If I'm Not Pleasing People It's My Fault When They Leave and it bit me
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"The drums rolled, and the crowds roared; and that, though no one knew it, was the end of the bright hope for a democratic Republic."
-R. R. Palmer, Twelve Who Ruled
#I remember when I first read about robespierres death in detail in a book#I was so moved that I just sat there n thought about it for an hour with much horror#but its kind of amazing discovering this community online because I had no idea others would feel just as strongly#but theres all these amazing posts and art today and I dunno its kind of cool that I'm not alone in my strong feelings about this I guess#frev#frev art#french revolution#robespierre#maximilien robespierre#thermidor#sigh#art#illustration#history art#history
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It honestly baffles me that some people are so casually dismissive of animals' feelings. Istg some ppl only see pets like toys and are barely able to hide it
#vent post alert#but I'm just so frustrated#my mom's dog got hit by a car yesterday and she refused to take him to the vet#she said she doesn't have any money for it and that he's fine#physically he seems fine just bruised. I think he might have something internal but she's been very dismissive of that#anyway. he spent the whole night crying bc he was alone and terrified#I went upstairs and almost begged her to take him to the vet but she still refused saying he was fine#then she put him inside her house and he calmed down after a while#the next morning when she came downstairs to talk to me she kept being dismissive#saying he was fine in the end he just wanted attention#and I'm like yeah?? obviously?? he got hit by a car???? the poor thing is traumatized and terrified#ofc he doesn't want to be alone#and she hit me with the 'dogs don't get traumatized. he's just being dramatic'#I pointed out some dogs have psychological pregnancy so ofc they have psychological problems too#and THEN she hit me with 'but those are female dogs. males are different. because hormones' like. WHAT#this just in not only do human males not have feelings but now dog males don't either. because hormones.#I thought my mom was smarter than this tbh#istg her boyfriend is just making her more ignorant. bc this is the kind of bs I expected to hear from him but not from her#anyway I don't know what to do. I don't have money for the vet either bc I just had to pay for a surgery#we talked and she said she'll monitor the dog and if he looks like he's getting worse she'll take him to the vet#ig I'll have to settle for that#I love my mom but man. this is weird#I just didn't expect it from her#what's worse is that when it's just her and me it's one thing. but when her bf is around I feel like she gets different#like with me she agrees but then around him she doesn't?? how am I supposed to trust her that way#it's all just so weird. idk what to think or what to feel rn. I just feel bad#sleep.txt
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dsaf 3 bad ending but told badly
#dsaf#dayshift at freddy's#dsaf jack#dsaf dave#jack kennedy#dave miller#dsaf old sport#dsaf henry miller#dr henry miller#dsaf henry#dsaf 3#dsaf shitpost#this is what happens when i'm left alone with my thoughts#the Brained Rot takes over
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And I forget sometimes I'm just flesh and bone.
As he stands in the ruined bathroom, all Rook can think is, At least now I can breathe.
#ts4#ts4 edit#the sims 4#sims 4 edit#my edits#ts4 render#my renders#blender render#oc: Rook#dnd sims#ts4 dnd#please I beg of you open this in a new tab and look it it. it's 2080px across and I spent way too long on tiny details.#(like the blood on the shards of glass on the sink. and the mirror alone took well over an hour...)#augh I love my boy so much#he's really going through it right now tho#poor bby#but when he's going through it I'm having fun playing him so...#yeah#blood tw#tw blood#so this is scheduled to go up right as we're starting our session picking up from exactly this point.#I thought that would be thematically fitting#please listen to this song it's so good and it's very Rook.#I almost put the lyrics right after this line (''I saw my reflection on the street that night / he said I got something to change your life#/ he said you don't look wrong but you don't look right'')#bc yk mirror shit. But I ended up going with this line instead because it's VERY VERY fitting for the conversations going on w/ Rook.#specifically about his reckless endangerment of himself to the point where some of his party members consider it to be self-harm.#(and obviously punching a mirror intentionally is self-harm.)#but like Rook doesn't see it that way and he's so confused as to why the party is so upset with him. (esp. his mentor and the gunslinger.)#god I could talk about this ridiculous man for hours so I'll stop here.
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Thinking about Mato and crying
He was the weakest of the brothers but the most excited and determined to become a nail master.
He looked up to Sheo so much, he is still thinking about him and hoping that he thinks of him and Oro in turn.
Sheo left them at some point to pursue another path and Oro betrayed and left Mato probably not long after.
Despite Mato's grudge against Oro the evidence that he still cares for him very much is there. specifically in the god home, where he jumps in to defend Oro when he is knocked down.
His dream nail dialogue in the fight is "Brothers always fight together!" And "Don't leave me behind!"
Clearly he feels he was abandoned by his brothers.
He thinks that he is unworthy of even being in the presence of the nail sage. His own father.
Mato is so enthusiastic and kind and so so lonely!!
He feels he is abandoned and unwanted, and he so desperately wants to be wanted!
and the thing that really gets me is just how much effort he puts into making it especially clear how loved and wanted his own pupil is!
If you choose not to be taught by him, he assumes you believe you are unworthy and quickly assures you that isn't true.
He gives you grand compliments, and tells you that "you honor him beyond words."
Even when he begins rambling about Oro after learning that you had met him, he quickly catches himself and says "I'm sorry. I shouldn't bother you with such things. I'm happy you were able to train under another nailmaster and grow stronger."
He so readily sets aside his grudge, and expresses his happiness for you !!
He genuinely wants his pupil to be proud of themself. He doesn't want them to ever feel the way he did.
He is so loving and so lonely..
When you come to visit him again for the first time, he is genuinely surprised and says it is "an honor he scarcely deserves"
This man needs a family!! This is a family man he shouldn't be alone!!!!
#ORO SHEO GIVE YOUR BABY BROTHER A HUG#SLY VISIT YOUR SON#HE SHOULDN'T BE LEFT ALONE#'don't leave me behind' I'm going to cry!!!!#I love them all but Mato is the best nailmaster I love a man who despite losing so much#remains kind#Also looking back at my first playthrough#when my siblings told me this character was gonna adopt me I did not expect him to literally adopt me#The way I accepted him as my dad so fast#He's the best dad I love him#I love him so much#hollow knight#hollow knight mato#hk mato#nailmaster mato#hk thoughts
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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Who the hell behind Justice League: Flashpoint Paradox decided that Bruce's lips had to be drawn??? He is literally the ONLY male character with lips drawn like this. Someone wants to kiss that man, that's the only explanation.
They went: "Imagine the Batman is in front of you. All cover in black, except for the lower of his face. And he has the most kissable lips ever."
#bruce wayne#batman#dc comics#my ramblings#when I say “kissable lips” I do not say I want to kiss him (gross that's my dad) I say the one who did it does#someone let the gay thoughts win#yes I'm betting on a man I have met way more men attracted to him than anyone else#this movie is weirdly gay#between this and Nora telling Barry he is gay and Hal not wanting to leave Flash alone to deal with the bomb
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Unpopular opinion:
Remus Lupin was as capable of cruelty and arrogance as the rest of the Marauders. There are plenty of hints of this in canon. The only reason we don't see this side of him as often is because of his heavy reluctante to be considered a "bad guy".
And he low-key enjoyed going against Snape just as much, he just had some conscience aftewards.
#which takes me to my next point#snupin would actually be a pretty dark and toxic ship if we follow remus's character#i mean c'mon#the asshole loved to taunt snape even as adults#back when i first read the books i thought lupin had a crush on snape because on how he spoke to him alone#i know most people characterize him as this sweet and gentle boy that wouldn't hurt a fly#and snupin is mostly written as a super romantic and fluffy dynamic#but no#if we were canon compliant snupin would be dark as hell#and i'm here for it#snape was canonically terrified of lupin and the bastard knew it#imagine how would that play in accurately written fics#snupin#remus lupin#severus snape#pro snape#anti marauders#pro severus snape#hp headcanons#harry potter
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fujigoe
#this will likely be the last of my recent twcfm posts#but i did love goemon's (and fujiko's) depictions/relationships#all goemon wants is a friend like him since he feels so alone in the world#but he fell in love with a person who doesn't exist#and he keeps setting himself up for failure by hoping for fujiko to change into the woman he thought she was#only to end up more lonely since before meeting fujiko (the ending of twcfm “resolves” their relationship but it felt wrapped up too soon)#also i'm specifically thinking of the scene where they're on the beach and goemon interprets her actions as having been good and honest for#once only to end up disappointed when she hadn't changed for the better to be more in line with his values#as for fujiko she got closure from her trauma but her relationship with goemon went nowhere#she was too traumatized to understand that goemon was trustworty and genuinely did love her unlike all the other men in her life so far#but it was interesting to see her being comfortable “alone” after she dealt with her trauma as well as her new outlook on life#but i still feel bad for goemon; he deserved better and all he wanted was for someone to want/love him and make him feel he belongs#lupin iii#lupin the third#lupin the 3rd#goemon ishikawa xiii#goemon#fujiko mine#twcfm#the woman called fujiko mine#fujigoe
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